Well, this is certainly a job I didn’t choose for myself and I didn’t even realise I had the ability until around eight years ago.
Well, this is certainly a job I didn’t choose for myself and I didn’t even realise I had the ability until around eight years ago. It’s been an up and down ride for sure. One worth taking though, as it’s opened up a beautiful life for my family and I. Before I started on this journey I was a very busy businesswoman with a graphic design and website business. I started the design business from scratch and it grew rapidly. I managed staff, I went to every networking function, networking group, Chamber of Commerce function, you name it – I was there! I loved, and still do, the business world. I thrived on it and it was part of me. Then I got pregnant. “I’ll just continue on and the baby will fit around me” I thought. “People do this every day, I’ll be fine!”
The day before I was due to be induced I was at work designing a website, don’t get me wrong though, I LOVED my work and it was exactly where I wanted to be. In labour I was taking work calls – ones that just couldn’t ‘apparently’ wait. I managed to have three days off work with my first child – my husband took three months paternity leave and loved every minute of it bonding with our new wee daughter. I enjoyed being able to work from home, thank goodness for technology, and also bonding with the family. We knew we wanted two children, but didn’t know much about them, so we went back for round two and our beautiful boy was born 13 months later. Our first child took her first steps the day our newborn came home from hospital. It was BUSY! I had no idea how tough this parenthood thing was going to be. My husband, again, took three months paternity leave and I, having reduced staff and workload to just me, managed to take two weeks off. Life continued on and a year later opportunity came up for my husband to work on an amazing project at work. It meant a lot of travel, two weeks in Australia followed by two weeks at home for an entire year. I am NEVER one to turn down amazing opportunities so encouraged him wholeheartedly to work on the project. It was a fantastic move for his career. The cracks were starting to show though, life was tough! I wasn’t getting the emotional support I needed, the people I expected to help me and boost me up instead made me feel inadequate and like I was failing. I wasn’t coping at all. I was diagnosed with postnatal depression and started on antidepressants when my youngest was one.
I started questioning my life; Why was I here? What on earth was I doing? I wanted to run away - so badly! I really wanted to heal from the depression, get on with life and keep moving forward so I started a self-development journey which I’ve been on for almost eight years now. Part of the journey was when I had this absolutely overwhelming feeling I just couldn’t shake - I was supposed to ‘heal spirits’. I truly thought I was going mad until someone in the spiritual world said it was completely normal and I was clairvoyant! That was a bit of a shock to the system. Memories came up of standing in front of a mirror around eight years of age when I was telling the voices in my head to just ‘leave me alone’ and they did. I never thought anything more about it until years later. I must have had the gift as a child but blocked it off because I didn’t understand. I’m not really sure to be honest, I just know the gifts I’ve got now are cool! It’s like learning to paint. Everyone starts at a certain point and with training some become professionals and some just make nice paintings, others might give up because it’s too hard.
It’s like everything in life, you have to give it a go. Through my hard work and determination to heal, I managed to say goodbye to postnatal depression many years ago now, and change a lot of my world. I’ve created a life I absolutely love. I moved away from the traditional business world when I sold in 2015. I now help businesses in a spiritual way, helping the owners shift blocks and beliefs and giving insight.
My family life is extremely happy, I totally love my work and, looking back I would never have thought this was possible.
These two books REALLY helped me through my journey; The Map by Bonni Lonnsburry and Journey of Souls by Michael Newton. The latter is available to listen to on YouTube. I listen to books as I find it so much more enjoyable and I can fit them more easily into everyday life.
I now personally see depression as being out of alignment with your true calling (or soul). Making necessary changes to make you feel happier is the key. Sometimes this is following a passion, sometimes this is moving away from people who make you feel like crap, sometimes it’s a change in location. We can all change our lives for the better, it takes a lot of work but, if you’re determined, you can do it! It’s absolutely worth the effort!
Getting depression turned out to be an amazing thing for me!A new path
I went to see Hayley about a topic close to my heart, I wanted to know all about my love life - or lack thereof. As a 34 year who hasn’t been in a ‘real’ committed relationship for over 10 years ...“Why am I single?”
It’s an exciting time right now, there are so many people questioning life, wondering what more is out there for them and contemplating changes towards happiness...Are you questioning your purpose?
Ready to get started?
Internal Solutions Ltd - Trading as Hayley Lowe - International Healer & Mentor, located online and in Lower Hutt, New Zealand
Copyright © Internal Solutions 2017 - Lower Hutt, Wellington, New Zealand