How to find your limiting beliefs: listen to your rants

Here's the question most people get stuck on. How do I actually find the beliefs that are holding me back?

One of the easiest ways I've found is this. Listen to yourself when you're having a rant.

You know the ones. The "I can't believe they did that to me" kind of vent. The "This always happens." The "If only that hadn't happened, my life would be different."

It might feel like you're just blowing off steam. Hidden in those words are the beliefs shaping how you experience the world.

Let's break down a rant

Say someone says:

"I can't believe Joe stole my bike all those years ago. If that hadn't happened, I would've gone to uni, I would've met the right people, I wouldn't be stuck in this job. People always screw me over. I try so hard and nothing ever works out. I'm just not one of those lucky ones."

It sounds like a casual vent. Look what's actually in there:

• "People always screw me over."
• "Nothing ever works out for me."
• "I'm not one of the lucky ones."
• "If that thing hadn't happened, my whole life would've been better."

These are beliefs. They're not facts, but the subconscious has decided they are.

What you believe, you look for

If you believe "the economy is down, no one's spending, there's no money out there", then even if you're working hard and showing up, your energy is still broadcasting that it's all pointless.

So you won't see the one person who is ready. You won't notice the opportunity that quietly walked in. Your brain keeps looking for evidence to confirm the belief.

This isn't about blame. It's about awareness.

How to spot your beliefs

1. Rant it out. Privately. Out loud, or into a voice note.
2. Let it be messy. Say all the dramatic, exaggerated things. No filter.
3. Listen back or write it down.
4. Highlight the "always", "never" and "because" phrases. These are belief goldmines.

Phrases like "People never listen to me." "If I was smarter, this wouldn't have happened." "Because I don't have this, I can't do that."

Right there is your subconscious blueprint.

Why this matters

Your subconscious beliefs shape your reality more than your conscious goals do.

You can write intentions and affirmations all day long. If your inner dialogue is quietly saying "there's no point, this won't work", you'll unconsciously sabotage the very things you're trying to call in.

We have to clear what we really believe, not just what we wish we believed.

Start here

• What do I really think is true about love, money or my worth?
• What phrases come up again and again when I'm frustrated?
• What story have I been telling myself for years?
• Is that actually true? Or is it something I learned because of what life showed me at one point?

Just spotting the belief is a huge win. Once you name it, you can begin to shift it.

It takes practice. And patience. And sometimes a bit of help. (Hi, that's me. This is one of my favourite things to help people with!)

You don't need to be perfect. You just need to be curious.

See how healing sessions work.