What your body is trying to tell you

When people come to see me they almost always arrive with something emotional. A relationship, a grief, a pattern that keeps repeating, a decision they can't make. Somewhere partway through, I'll get a sense of a particular part of their body, and I'll mention it. Often, that's exactly where they've been holding tension.

It stopped surprising me a long time ago.

The body tells the truth first

The body has usually been holding the story for years before the mind gets around to saying it out loud, and by the time someone can put words to what's wrong, their system has been carrying it quietly for a very long time.

The mind produces an acceptable answer because it knows what you're supposed to be coping with. The body has no such filter.

See your doctor first

None of this is instead of seeing your doctor. If something hurts or isn't right, get it looked at and follow the treatment you're given. I don't diagnose, and nothing here is medical advice.

What I offer sits alongside that. Once the physical side is being looked after, it can be worth asking a second, gentler question: what has my body been carrying emotionally?

What I often notice

This is the symbolic language I see again and again in sessions. It isn't a rule and it isn't a diagnosis. It's a starting point for your own curiosity.

The hips often hold what we haven't processed and what we're afraid to move towards. People tell me they tighten when they're standing at the edge of a decision they keep not making.

The neck tends to stiffen when someone is getting on your nerves, and you can usually name them.

The throat tightens around what hasn't been said.

The shoulders carry responsibility, especially the kind that was never yours.

The skin is the interesting one. Symbolically it's your boundary, the place where you end and the world begins, and people often become more aware of it when that line has been under strain for too long.

Journalling prompts

• Where does my body hold tension, and when did I first notice it?
• If that tension could speak, what would it be complaining about?
• What am I carrying that isn't mine to carry?
• What have I been calling fine that my body clearly disagrees with?

If your body is still carrying one particular moment, read about trauma clearing after an accident or shock.